Why Don’t Most Kid’s Fight Back?

A huge majority of people have had a bully in their lifetime. Why didn’t they fight back when they had the chance?

While I think there are many, many reasons people, kids mostly, don’t fight back when they are experiencing bullying in their life.

I believe that there are THREE core reasons why kids don’t fight back when they are being bullied.

Here I will list these reasons and also how to help that child get a little confidence in their life so that they do have the opportunity to take control of their feelings and their life.

There are 3 major reasons that kid’s don’t fight back.

#1 – THEY DON’T KNOW HOW!

The amount of adults that have walked through life without a physical altercation is astonishing. I speak with people every day that are looking for martial arts because they realize that they have NO idea what is going on when it comes to any kind of fight. The fact is, PARENTS don’t have the skills necessary to teach their kids to defend themselves. My Father used to tell me, “Son, just one good punch in the nose will send tears to his eyes and he won’t know what to do.” MY DAD WAS DEAD WRONG! 😅 Putting your child in martial arts under a QUALIFIED instructor can help ease the embarrassment and pain that this may cause.

#2 – “That kid just needs to toughen up”

This drives me NUTS! I hear this from people on the internet and facebook posts every time a bully piece hits the nightly news. This may come as a stark realization but, not all people are born tough. In fact, not many are. Their circumstances and life story are what makes them that way. And, for most people in the US, life is pretty easy. If you want your child to be more mentally or physically tough, you have to expose them to a type of stressor that is both healthy and difficult. Training martial arts under a qualified professional will have your child maturing both physically and mentally.

#3- Their parents never taught them how to deal with pressure!

This is HUGE! When I ask some of my students that have had bullying problems in the past why they didn’t fight back, they say, “I just froze.” Anxiety is the fear of the future and unknown. If you are prepared for a future event that FREEZE doesn’t happen. Again, training somewhere that places healthy parameters for your child to grow can have them respond much better to bigger, more stressful experiences that happen in their life.

BONUS- They are afraid that they will get into trouble.

We don’t just teach kids to handle physical altercations. We teach them how to use “verbal jiu-jitsu”; how to take a bully down with just using your voice and brain as your primary attributes. If these first tactics don’t work then we know we tried everything we could before we had to get physical. This helps when explaining things to a school admin about the ongoing bullying problems.

Make your kids do hard stuff! They’ll whine but, they’ll live.